They say you end up marrying your mother. I don’t think that’s strictly true but I did end up marrying a mother. Jersey girl and I celebrated our one year wedding anniversary on Friday and today it’s Mother’s Day here in America.
When I made my commitment to Jersey, I also knew I was committing to her three kids (all girls) and I knew she was a mother first and everything else second. I completely understood that, as it had always been my approach to parenting too.
I also knew that all of this could fall over – and I would be done – if, when I met her kids, they didn’t accept me. I guess I’m living a charmed life because they took to me far better than I ever had a right to expect.
And so, in the end, I didn’t just find a wife, I found a family waiting for me on the other side of the world. A family that admitted, not only me but my own son right along with me.
My boy has visited us three times since I arrived here permanently and has been welcomed with open arms not only by Jersey and the girls but the extended family as well. My wife has embraced her new adult son as if he were her own. This has been a tremendous boon to me as he lost his real mother a little over five years ago.
So, on this rainy Mothers Day in NJ, I just wanted to take a few moments to celebrate a really wonderful mom.
Happy Mother’s Day my love.
And while I’m at it, Happy Mother’s Day to you too, mum. You are so missed. Wish I could just say hi.
Surely one of the most amusing relationship dynamics in popular music is that between Bruce Springsteen and the Governor of New Jersey, Chris Christie (a name which itself would seem more at home on a pop star than a politician).
Christie, a Republican, has for years been on the record as a HUGE Springsteen fan who’s attended over 100 shows and has often been seen bopping in the good seats pretty much any time the Boss has played the Jersey/NYC area.
Springsteen, an avowed progressive, loathes everything Christie stands for with every fiber of his being and never misses an opportunity to lambast the Governor over his mishandling of Bruceland.. I mean, the great state of New Jersey.
With the exception of a rare period of détente around the aftermath of Superstorm Sandy (how delicious is that irony, btw?) where the two appeared to mend the battered fence somewhat, the ideological differences have made any sustained relationship impossible.
Not so very long after Sandy, during the, so called, ‘Bridgegate’ debacle, Springsteen appeared on the Jimmy Fallon Show to mock the besieged Governor in song.
This must have stung Christie to some extent and in 2015 during an interview for LifeZette, he professed to like Bon Jovi more than the Boss. Then, several months later, he delivered what could only be described as the coup de grace to his tempestuous (and largely imaginary) relationship. In an interview with Sean Hannity, he stated bluntly that he is not friends with Springsteen, only that he knows him. And that he is friends with Bon Jovi.
This didn’t stop Christie from tweeting this little anecdote on the 40th anniversary of Born to Run;
This fractious situation has been playing out for years now and begs the question, why was Christie so enamored of an artist whose very core beliefs were and remain diametrically opposed to his own anyway?
Some say that the Governor’s great love of all things Boss was just politicking, a way of playing to the stands and showing New Jersians that he is one of them. This, however, does not actually seem to be the case.
Christie’s great unrequited love for Bruce seems to have been very long standing and completely genuine. Recently uncovered emails from the Springsteen listserv archives show the depth of the Governor’s early obsession.
Date: Fri, 21 Jan 2000 12:32:22 EST
Subject: Brush with Bruce at 30,000 feet
I am mostly a lurker, but now that the holiday craze is over, I have time to sit down and impart my great experience from the last show in Minnesota. My wife and I saw the second Asbury Park rehearsal, 8 of the NJ shows and one in Philly. What a great year. We finished up with “The last show of the Century” entertaining 15 clients at the final show in Minnesota. The show was amazing and everyone had a great time. But for us, the best was about to happen the next day.
We board the 11 am Northwest flight back to NJ the day after the show. My wife and I are sitting in 1st row of 1st class and getting out our books out of our bags and putting the luggage away in the overheads. From behind me I hear a voice say,”I think I’m sitting right back here.” I knew immediately–it was Bruce!
He was by himself–no Patty, no bodyguards–just Bruce, a baseball cap, jeans jacket, NY Times and Minneapolis Star-Tribune. I immediately go off the deep end.
The plane is then delayed 30 minutes on the ground and we have our chance. We walked back to see Bruce, introduced ourselves and told him we had flown in for the show last night and were headed home. He said, “Me, too.” We thanked him for the great performance the night before (and for all the great nights). He was incredibly gracious, we chatted briefly about where we lived, etc., and then said good-bye and went back to our seats (he was in the last row of 1st class).
When we landed in Newark we walked off the plane with Bruce right next to us. I asked him if I could tell him a little story. I told him about the night he played Sandy at the Continental Arena. My 6 year old son Andrew and I were in the front row on tix we won in the KACF auction. Bruce had thrown him a pick earlier in the evening and acknowledged his energy at 11 PM during Land of Hope and Dreams. (He said, looking at my six year old son, “He’s still going?”) He then introduced Sandy by pointing to my son and saying “We’re gonna send you home with a little lullaby.” As I finished this story in the jetway, Bruce said, “That was your little guy?” I said yes and told him how much it meant to my son (he’ll still calls Sandy “his” song) and how much it meant to me. He said he remebered and called Andrew “crazy” with a big grin and chuckle. He told me to tell Andrew he was glad he had such a good time and to come back again. I then asked Bruce if he could sign an autograph to Andrew and his 3 year old sister Sarah Anne (who had also been to 2 shows–one in Philly and one in Jersey). He was happy to do it and signed to both of them. He shook my hand, told my wife to make sure the kids got the autograph and wished us a Merry Christmas. His ride was waiting at the gate and he walked away. What an incredible time for me, a Bruce fan since 1976.
He was everything I hoped he would be if I ever got a chance to meet him–gracious and incredibly normal in a truly extraordinary way. That was my Christmas gift.
Chris from Mendham, NJ
I wonder how Bruce would have reacted had he known who that gushing fan would turn out to be in later years. I’d like to think he’d have been just as gracious. Christie didn’t approach his hero as a Republican but as a fan and a fellow music lover.
True Springsteen fans really should not be surprised by this seemingly contradictory state of affairs. The fact is, politics have nothing to do with music. You can shoehorn political messages into your songs but that’s rarely what people are responding to when they listen. It’s the emotions conveyed that determine how people will react. And your emotions are not governed by your political stripe.
Many of the blue-collar folk who listen to (and draw comfort from) Springsteen’s music are heartland Republicans who, nevertheless recognize themselves in the characters that populate the songs of this unapologetic progressive. Springsteen wouldn’t have it any other way, I’m sure.
The themes that can be found running through albums like Born to Run and Darkness on the Edge of Town are universal. Springsteen doesn’t write about Republicans and Democrats, he writes about Americans and about those elements of our identity that are true for all.
So, though the relationship between Christie and his Boss is amusing on one level, on another it is a pure expression of the unity and inclusiveness that good music holds out to us all. The Governor has never been turned away from a Bruce show and I hope he never will be.
I want to tell you a little story. This story, unlike many of my posts, has a beginning a middle and an actual end. It starts back in Melbourne about a year ago but mostly plays out on a steamy Summer’s night (last night in fact) at the Stone Pony in Asbury Park.
Shall I begin, then? Good.
Sometime last year (I forget quite when it was), while I was stuck back in Melbourne feeling nostalgic for all things Jersey, I was reading up on the history of Asbury Park. I was particularly interested in the musical significance of venues like The Stone Pony and the Wonderbar and was getting that familiar itch to be back there.
On a whim, I typed, “Asbury Park bands” into YouTube, thinking, “I wonder if the next E Street Band is slogging its heart out around the traps of AP, hoping a little Bruce magic might rub off on them?”
Almost immediately, I stumbled across some videos of a band called Deal Casino. The first was a live video of them playing a small gig at Porta (that’s the old Student Prince, Springsteen fans). They sounded tight and I was pretty impressed by the songwriting.
Next, I found a number of their recorded tracks and was instantly taken with this one in particular (obviously the Bruce reference helped).
I got on iTunes then and found them easily enough (a minor miracle on the Australian version). They had a number of EPs out at the time and so I downloaded the lot and ‘liked’ the band on social media so that I’d be able to keep track of what they were up to.
Jump forward to just a few short weeks ago, me back now in Jersey and newly married. I was aware that the band were about to drop their first album and was fully intending to download it at the first opportunity when, quite out of the blue, I received a friend request from Christopher Donofrio, drummer with Deal Casino.
I accepted, of course, and, almost immediately, got a message from him saying, “Hi Tony! This is Chris from the band Deal Casino. We are mailing tickets directly for our record release show because T**********r sucks. Let me know if you’d be interested in coming!”
Needless to say, I was in and so, we purchased said tickets – at a considerable saving – and, just a few days later, they duly arrived (complete with a free vinyl single, I might add).
So, last night, Jersey girl and I jumped in the car and drove down to Asbury Park. The traffic gods were kind and we arrived with time to spare, so we strolled the boardwalk, had a couple of beers at the Beach Bar, and then a delicious dinner at our favourite Cuban restaurant, Cubacan.
As it turns out, we hadn’t had quite as much time as we’d thought, so missed the first support band, Born Cages. We did, however, catch the second band, The Cold Seas and they were amazing. If I had to categorise them, I’d say they fall within the Post-rock genre.
We both really vibed on these guys and I downloaded all their available recorded material as soon as I got up this morning; really good stuff.
Deal Casino took the stage not long after (I like a band that doesn’t keep its audience waiting around too long) and the gig took off.
Deal Casino are: vocals, guitar – Joe P. Parella, guitar, keys – Jozii Cowell, bass – Jon Rodney, drums – Chris Donofrio. I’m not sure how the band divide writing duties but the songs have a consistency of vision that suggests that it’s mostly down to one member.
The thing that struck me the most about the gig was how dedicated the crowd was. You got the distinct impression that there was a strong core of people present who go to every show the band plays in NJ. Having now experienced them live, I can understand where that loyalty comes from. It all made for a really entertaining experience.
At one point, a large section of the audience suddenly squatted down on the floor during an extended guitar build, only to leap back up as one and go wild at the song’s big crescendo.
Joe really is a very good vocalist and his voice never wavered through what was, in the end, a pretty long night. His command of the stage was impressive and he even indulged in a little onstage Springsteenesque storytelling. And what was the subject of his story? How he came to be inspired by Bruce and the E Street Band, of course.
It transpired that Joe and another member of the band (not sure which) have held day jobs at Porta. I wondered if they knew the significance of that place in the Springsteen legend.
I also have to say that, though every member of Deal Casino is extremely good at what they do, Chris needs to be singled out for special mention here; he is one of the best rock drummers I’ve seen in a very long time. I wish I’d filmed the crazy solo he performed (with a little technical aid from Joe), it was mind-blown good.
So that was my first ever gig at the famous Stone Pony (Jersey girl saw TheGaslight Anthem play the Summer stage several years ago so, for her, only the first inside gig). It seemed very appropriate to be seeing a couple of young up-and-coming bands at the venue that birthed such legends as the Asbury Dukes and Bon Jovi all those years ago.
Oh, I promised you an actual ending to my story.
This morning, I was putting some of my phone pics of the night up on my Facebook page and, literally within moments, Chris posted a comment thanking me for coming. That’s before any of my actual friends had even hit ‘like’ and, even more incredibly, at 9.30 am!
What he was even doing awake so early after a gig like that is beyond me, but I predict that kind of dedication to the fans is going to take this band far. If this show was anything to go by, they certainly deserve to get where they’re going.
Deal Casino’s self-titled debut album is available now.
Words and images (except where otherwise credited) are my own.
“Before we play a little bit, I’d like to say a few things about why we’re down here tonight. Mainly I’d like to say that I think that the marriage between a community and a company is a special thing, it involves a special trust and even 400 jobs is a lot of work lost in a small town.
“What do you do when after 10 years or 20 years, you wake up in the morning and you see your livelihood sailing away from you, leaving you standing on the beach? What happens when the jobs go away and the people remain? I’d like to say what goes unmeasured is the price that unemployment inflicts on people’s families, on their marriages, on the single mothers out there trying to raise their kids on their own.
“Now, the 3M company, it’s their money and it’s their plant but it’s the 3M workers’ jobs. I’m here tonight to just say that I think that after 25 years of service from a community that there’s a debt owed to the 3M workers and to my hometown.”
Bruce Springsteen at the Stone Pony; 19 January, 1986. performing a benefit gig for workers from the Freehold 3M plant that was about to be permanently closed down.
The Stone Pony in Asbury Park is generally acknowledged to be one of the most important live Rock venues of all time. It is often mentioned by music historians in the same breath as CBGB, Whiskey a Go Go, and the Cavern Club.
And for almost the entire of the club’s forty three year history, it has been closely associated with one rock icon in particular. Bruce Springsteen’s relationship with the Pony is legendary. Following the closure of the Upstage club when he was still living in and around Asbury Park, through all the years of touring, Springsteen has been a fairly regular fixture at the club.
It has been estimated that the Boss has played the Pony stage some 100 times and, with the exception of private gigs to fundraise for his children’s various schools, has never once been billed there.
His first ever Pony performance was on Sept. 8, ’74. Springsteen was jamming with an outfit called The Blackberry Booze Band featuring none other than Steve Van Zandt and Southside Johnny Lyon. Blackberry would go on to become the Asbury Dukes.
Springsteen’s star was already in ascendance when the Pony opened its doors in 1973 but, even after he had gained considerable fame and recognition with his breakout album, Born to Run, he could still be found hanging around the Pony, occasionally even jumping the bar and serving drinks to customers (by all accounts he sucked pretty hard as a barkeep).
Almost all of his public appearances at the pony have been jams with other artists. These have included: Blackberry Booze Band, Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes, Clarence Clemons, The Shakes, The Band’s Levon Helm, Joe Grushecky, Soozie Tyrell, Lord Gunner Group, Marshall Crenshaw, Little Steven, Bobby Bandiera, Nils Lofgren, and Jimmy Cliff.
The relationship has not always been harmonious, however. There was a period from October ’77 until May ’82 where Springsteen shifted his allegiance from the Pony to the Asbury Lanes across town. This reputedly had something to do with fellow E Streeter, Danny Federici getting tossed out of the Pony one night for general rowdiness which apparently did not go over too well with Springsteen.
By May ’82, all was presumably forgiven as Bruce took to the Pony’s stage again with a vengeance, playing 14 Sunday night jams with house band, Cats on a Smooth Surface.
On June 8, ’84 The E Street Band launched their mega, Born In The USA tour with a warm-up gig at, you guessed it, The Stone Pony. Twelve songs were played that night, including the live debuts of Born in the U.S.A., Glory Days, My Hometown, and Darlington County.
The Pony has not only served as a handy place for Bruce to play, it was for many years a safe haven, one of the few places he could relax among the public without the fear of constant harassment from eager fans. It is an unwritten law around the Pony that you don’t get up in Springsteen’s face. That’s a rare kind of respect.
The Pony also happens to be the place where, back in the early 80’s, Bruce met his now wife and fellow band mate, Patti Scialfa.
I had a job, I had a girl
I had something going mister in this world
I got laid off down at the lumber yard
Our love went bad, times got hard
Now I work down at the carwash
Where all it ever does is rain
Don’t you feel like you’re a rider on a downbound train
The above phrase was coined by the poet and critic Randall Jarrell about New Jersey poet William Carlos Williams (1883 to 1963). Williams was, in my opinion, one of the greatest poets America has yet produced and he spent almost his entire life in the town where he was born (Rutherford NJ).
In that regard, he reminds me of another great New Jersey wordsmith writing in the American idiom, Bruce Springsteen whom, despite his frequent tours and travels, cannot quite seem to stray too far from the town of his birth for any great length of time.
That is not the only similarity the two great men share in common. Both have used their work and talents to explore the minutiae of everyday peoples’ lives. The comedian John Stewart once famously said of Springsteen “When you listen to Bruce’s music, you’re no longer a loser, you’re a character in an epic poem… about losers”. This assessment could just as easily be applied to Williams.
The epic poem Paterson, written in five volumes over a period of twelve years, was Williams’ ode to that Northern Jersey city and its people. Joycean in its scope, Paterson is built around the modernist poet’s philosophy no ideas but in things.
I take this to mean that the seed is there in the commonplace situations and mundane moments of ordinary life, that there is no need to create grand poetical ideas; the poetry resides in the world around you.
An example of this can be found in his simple work The red wheelbarrow;
so much depends upon
a red wheel barrow
glazed with rain water
beside the white chickens.
In focussing on the very ordinary, Williams allows us an in to the poetic beauty and simple grandeur of the everyday.
This sort of greatness in the small things approach has come to be a hallmark of Springsteen’s work also. There is a no ideas but in things element in songs such as My hometown:
I was eight years old and running with a dime in my hand Into the bus stop to pick up a paper for my old man I’d sit on his lap in that big old Buick and steer as we drove through town He’d tousle my hair and say son take a good look around this is your hometown
Both men have been deeply touched by the lives of everyday folk and both have striven to express the simple nobility to be found in unremarkable lives. Williams, in his poem Pastoral, conveyed his admiration for those who can only abide:
Meanwhile, The old man who goes about Gathering dog lime Walks in the gutter Without looking up And his tread Is more majestic than That of the Episcopal minister Approaching the pulpit Of a Sunday. These things Astonish me beyond words.
Both Williams and Springsteen were of mixed heritage (Springsteen Irish, Italian, and Dutch and Williams English, Dutch, and Spanish) and both have struggled with bouts of depression – a condition which, I believe, lends insight and compassion to the efforts of poets.
Williams was a not insignificant influence upon the beat poets and was mentor to Alan Ginsberg who, like Williams, hailed from Northern New Jersey. The beat poets were, in turn, an influence upon the very counter culture which, indirectly, birthed Springsteen.
I have found, in the works of both men, my personal entrée into the heart and soul of New Jersey; perhaps America as a whole. Certainly, as an immigrant coming to this land to build a new life, the America I am longing for is the America of Bruce Springsteen and William Carlos Williams.
William Carlos Williams is as magically observant and mimetic as a good novelist. He reproduces the details of what he sees with surprising freshness, clarity, and economy; and he sees just as extraordinarily, sometimes, the forms of this earth, the spirit moving behind the letters. His quick transparent lines have the nervous and contracted strength, move as jerkily and intently as a bird. ~ Randall Jarrell
“This is Newark, New Jersey . . . This is Newark, New Jersey . . . Warning! Poisonous black smoke pouring in from Jersey marshes.” – Orson Welles Mercury theatre production of The War of the Worlds (1938)
We might have a competition on our hands here if we restrict ourselves solely to the shenanigans of lawmakers working in or around the state capital, Trenton. Lord Cornbury, New Jersey’s first Colonial governor, was famous for taking bribes and filling key posts with relatives. He also happened to enjoy dressing like a woman. One of Cornbury’s most recent successors, Jim McGreevey, appointed a former Israeli naval officer named Golan Cipel to oversee the state’s homeland security interests—not, it turned out, because he was qualified for the position (which foreign nationals aren’t actually allowed to fill), but because he and McGreevey were allegedly having sex. When Cipel (who denies the affair) threatened to sue McGreevey for sexual harassment, the married governor resigned and came out of the closet.
I was raised out of steel here in the swamps of Jersey….
And my machine, she’s a dud, out stuck in the mud somewhere in the swamps of Jersey…
“You were crunching on glass,” said Tony Kingslow, a 15-year-old who was part of the Teaneck group. “It was just a mess. Bottles everywhere, glass everywhere, you saw rags with blood on it. You couldn’t believe that happened.”
As they continued walking, Mulligan and his friends saw a burning, overturned car.
“There was a huge circle of people around it, throwing everything and anything in the fire,” he said. “We hung out until we were almost hit with some flying bottles.”
News reports alleged that concert-goers threw bottles at firefighters responding to the car fires.
“A heavy black fog hanging close to the earth . . . of extreme density, nature unknown. No sign of heat ray. Enemy now turns east, crossing Passaic River into the Jersey marshes.”
Tonight I’m layin’ here But there’s something in my ear Sayin’ there’s a little town just beneath the floodline Needs a local hero Somebody with the right style Lookin’ for a local hero Someone with the right smile Local hero local hero she said with a smile Local hero he used to live here for a while
In many ways, this blog is about dreams coming true. After finding each other in this vast ocean of humanity and then being forced to live a world apart for over five years, Jersey girl’s and my dream of being together finally came to pass last month.
And last night another dream came true.
As a special Birthday treat, Jersey girl took me to Asbury Park to see the world premiere of ‘Just Before the Dawn’, a new documentary about the history of the local music scene and in particular the jam club known as the Upstage.
After the movie (which screened at the Paramount theatre), there was to be an Upstage style jam session featuring some former E Street band members including David Sancious, Vini ‘Mad Dog’ Lopez, and Ernest ‘Boom’ Carter.
I was really looking forward to seeing these E Street legends play and was thrilled by rumours that Little Steven (Van Zandt) might join them up on stage.
We arrived in Asbury about an hour and a half before the show and, after a quick pit stop (burgers and a couple of beers at the Anchor’s Bend, conveniently situated in the Convention Hall), we joined the queue that was now snaking through the Grand Arcade. After a small wait, we got inside and took our seats in the balcony with a good view of the stage and screen. There was a lot of equipment on the stage and I realised this was going to be a bigger jam than I’d imagined; all the better.
The movie was great. I’m not going to write a review but it was thoroughly enjoyable and thought-provoking in equal measure. I’ve covered many of the events that the movie focused on right here on this blog but this was different. These were the experiences of people who lived these events so it was fascinating for me to see how their recollections added to the historical tapestry.
After the movie, the thing we’d been half expecting was announced, “Little Steven is in the house!” Uproarious applause, then, “Southside’s in the house!”
I was ecstatic. Two of my idols! Then the curtain went up on the show and those in the know were already cheering with delight. Jersey girl was looking at a certain guitarist in the back behind Stevie. “Wow, he looks like – wait – is that?”
The man himself – fresh from his well-documented celebrity cruise with the Obamas on Geffen’s mega yacht – had made it back to Jersey for this most special of nights. The crowd, predictably, went wild and we were treated to a night of raw musicianship from some of the very best in the business.
Highlights for me included a spirited rendition of The Band’s classic ‘Up on Cripple Creek’ and David Sancious and Marc Ribler executing a perfect performance of the Hendrix standard ‘Voodoo Child’. It turns out keyboardist Sancious can shred on a guitar like a boss.
The real Boss also managed some primo shredding and, though he chose not to dominate the proceedings, certainly made his presence felt.
It’s obvious from the photos that we only had our phones with us to capture the event. Jersey’s phone is slightly better than mine and so the closer shots come courtesy of her.
I’m sure that, in the days ahead, there’ll be a plethora of wonky videos shot on smartphones capturing every aspect of the evening. Like, for instance, these…
This night was a real ‘I was there when’ moment if ever there was one. Just one month in New Jersey and the magic’s already sparking.